October 15th is Infancy Loss Awareness
When you find out you’re going to be a mother, it’s the most wonderful feeling ever. The overjoyed feeling that you’ve discovered life blossoming in your belly consumes your spirit & there’s nothing else you would rather speak on. Every day, millions of women are blessed with gifts to cherish for the rest of their lives, and every day millions of lives are lost with what was.
As I write this, I would like to honor every hard working mother out there who continues to strive for their goals & maintain their family; however, this one isn’t for you. No matter what your case may be: miscarriage, abortion, adoption, SIDS, stillbirth whatever, you’re still a mother. You may not have a physical being here to love and hold, but a mothering spirit never leaves. It’s harder to accept, depending on your loss, but the one thing I can tell you is to continue to be strong.
As tough as you know you are, it isn’t your fault. For years, I beat and blamed myself for my actions and that I figured I could have prevented it, but it was already too late. I had already changed; on the inside I craved the love that once filled me up and the bitter sweetness of pain. Not a day goes by that I don’t consider what my life would be if my angel were here.
Instead of resenting these actions, look at what you’ve been through since. Would you want to bring a blessing into a mess? You were given a chance to make your life better than the situation you were in. It’s hard for me to write this & not be overwhelmed with emotion because I know somewhere, someone is breaking. Every day I see a new mother on my timeline and I congratulate each one and pray for their safe journey through motherhood. Angels come and go and mines watches over me.
I love you, forever and always.